Eat, Pray, Love, Write about it

I guess most of the female population of America and much of the world has read Elizabeth Gilbert's book Eat, Pray, Love. It is Gilbert's memoir of her failed relationships and of her decision to travel in order to heal her resulting depression and sadness and to seek spiritual awareness.

The book might be summed up briefly, and unkindly, as "Rich American divorcee spends a year weeping through three countries beginning with the letter 'I' while searching for God." It is prophetic that the three countries she decides to visit on her quest all begin with the letter "I" - namely, Italy, India and Indonesia - because that seems to be where all her problems and unhappiness begin as well. I, I, I.

I (there's that letter again) found it hard to warm up to Gilbert at first, mostly because I've known so many women in her situation who were not able to take themselves off to exotic places in order to confront their demons with the help of a guru. They had to stand and fight their demons on their home turf, often with children hanging onto them and impeding their efforts to defend themselves. But, halfway through Italy, I decided that I shouldn't hold Gilbert's wealth against her. Just because she was financially able to spend a year traveling around the world did not make her pain and depression any less real or any less deserving of sympathy. And it didn't make her struggles to overcome her problems and find peace in her life any less heartrending.

Gilbert's plan was to spend four months in each country. Her first stop was Italy, which was to be devoted to the pursuit of pleasure. Mostly eating. She gained 23 pounds there in four months. Her next four month period was spent in an ashram in India, seeking the spiritual and learning how to pray. The last four months, which I am in the middle of in my reading, were spent on the island of Bali in Indonesia, where she hopes to learn to balance physical pleasure and the spiritual. Will she manage it? Since Julia Roberts is playing her in the movie that comes out tomorrow, I'm hazarding a guess that the answer is yes.

It's easy to understand why this book strikes a chord with women. Divorce is a common fact of life in modern society and failed romantic relationships have been a given of humankind since we swung down from the trees and learned to stand upright. Even for women who haven't experienced divorce, we have all experienced failures in our lives, failures that make us sad and sometimes threaten to overwhelm us. The lucky among us, like Gilbert, are able to come to terms with those feelings and learn that, in the end, we are responsible for our own happiness. We make our own heaven or hell right here on earth.

Whether we travel the world to learn that or gain the epiphany in our own backyard, the lesson is no less real or liberating.

Poetry Sunday: Don't Hesitate by Mary Oliver

How about we share another Mary Oliver poem? After all, you can never have too many of those. In this one, the poet seems to acknowledge that it is often hard to simply live in and enjoy the moment, perhaps because we are afraid it can't last. She urges us to give in to that moment and fully experience the joy. Although "much can never be redeemed, still, life has some possibility left." Don't Hesitate by Mary Oliver If you suddenly and unexpectedly feel joy, don’t hesitate. Give in to it. There are plenty of lives and whole towns destroyed or about to be. We are not wise, and not very often kind. And much can never be redeemed. Still, life has some possibility left. Perhaps this is its way of fighting back, that sometimes something happens better than all the riches or power in the world. It could be anything, but very likely you notice it in the instant when love begins. Anyway, that’s often the case. Anyway, whatever it is, don’t be afraid of its plenty. Joy is no...

Poetry Sunday: Blackberry-Picking by Seamus Heaney

My mother was a farm wife and a prodigious canner. She canned fruit and vegetables from the garden, even occasionally meat. But the best thing that she canned, in my opinion, was blackberry jam. Even as I type those words my mouth waters! Of course, before she could make that jam, somebody had to pick the blackberries. And that somebody was quite often named Dorothy. I think Seamus Heaney might have spent some time among the briars plucking those delicious black fruits as well, so he would have known that "Once off the bush the fruit fermented, the sweet flesh would turn sour." They don't keep; you have to get that jam made in a hurry! Blackberry-Picking by Seamus Heaney Late August, given heavy rain and sun For a full week, the blackberries would ripen. At first, just one, a glossy purple clot Among others, red, green, hard as a knot. You ate that first one and its flesh was sweet Like thickened wine: summer's blood was in it Leaving stains upon the tongue and lust ...

Poetry Sunday: Hymn for the Hurting by Amanda Gorman

You probably remember poet Amanda Gorman from her appearance at the inauguration of President Biden. She read her poem "The Hill We Climb" on that occasion. After the senseless slaughter in Uvalde this week, she was inspired to write another poem which was published in The New York Times. It seemed perfect for the occasion and so I stole it in order to feature it here, just in case you didn't get a chance to read it in the Times . Hymn for the Hurting by Amanda Gorman Everything hurts, Our hearts shadowed and strange, Minds made muddied and mute. We carry tragedy, terrifying and true. And yet none of it is new; We knew it as home, As horror, As heritage. Even our children Cannot be children, Cannot be. Everything hurts. It’s a hard time to be alive, And even harder to stay that way. We’re burdened to live out these days, While at the same time, blessed to outlive them. This alarm is how we know We must be altered — That we must differ or die, That we must triumph or try. ...

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